Lately I have been exploring the concept of value conflicts, and this topic is extremely impactful for your growth and freedom. First I will explain what is a value conflict and how to recognize when it happens. Value conflicts are often rooted in false layers of self-identity and will block your progress.

Your subconscious mind always values truth, always values freedom, always values power and always values abundance. The problem is when other conscious values conflict with those. Or, when you have blocks towards certain values that are required to make the deeper value a reality. If you want to lose weight but don’t like exercise and love cakes, that’s a value conflict. If you want to live abundantly but don’t want a job and don’t want a business, that’s a value conflict. If you value renewal but not death, that’s a value conflict.

When it comes to spiritual growth, value conflicts are all about you and have nothing to do with anybody else. I would describe the effect you can get from resolving value conflicts as “self-sustaining open-air nuclear reaction.” It is very powerful. It is about shifting at your core to open new worlds of possibilities.

There are five different types of value conflicts.

1. Subconscious Denial: This is when you have knee-jerk reactions towards something related to truth, freedom or abundance and say “that’s not my cup of tea”. An example would be someone saying  that being emotional or vulnerable is for weak people. Someone could also be progressing in a path of self-development and fall into anger and withdrawal when touching the topic of sexuality because she has been raped. It is an irrational reaction covered with a rational explanation to protect from a deeper pain that the person is not ready to accept.

Symptoms: “not my cup of tea”, knee-jerk reaction, anger, withdrawal.

2. Subconscious Avoidance: This is when something related to truth, freedom or abundance is in a blind spot and you never really pay attention to it. I cannot quote an example because those in that situation cannot talk about their blind spots. When facing an opportunity related to something they avoid, they don’t know how to process it, are just confused, can’t articulate what’s going on and will just walk back silently. An example would be someone who gets plenty of training on personal development and goals achievement but knows nothing about the meanings of “being”, “presence” and “authenticity.”

Symptoms: Confusion, silence, hearing crickets, withdrawal.

3. Valuing Outcome: This is when you value an outcome but not what’s required to make it happen. An example would be someone who want to lose weight but don’t want to exercise, or someone who values living a greater purpose but doesn’t value the actions required to make it happen. This causes procrastination and a lack of results. When in that zone, you can waste years following tons of training and proven systems and nothing will work.

Symptoms: Procrastination, lack of results, laziness, illusionary comfort.

4. Unconscious Conflict: This is when you consciously value two things without realizing they don’t quite fit together. For example, if you value integrity and spiritual alignment while your actions are purely based on logic, opportunities and contracts, you may use integrity and spiritual alignment as surface decoration without realizing they don’t quite fit with your foundation. This can cause all kinds of conflicts with the people around you which you’ll see as unavoidable. It also dilutes your power and effectiveness.

Symptoms: Lack of clarity, tiredness, friction, conflicts, diluted power and effectiveness.

5. Conscious Conflict: This is when you consciously value two things and know they don’t quite fit together. An example would be someone who has experience with stillness spirituality and also with force of life spirituality, values both and doesn’t quite know how to make these two worlds fit together. It is extremely common for spiritual people to not quite know how to integrate spirituality into their physical world. It can also happen if you get advice from a coach that conflicts with the knowledge you already have. The only ways to move past a conscious value conflict are to either find a higher truth where both perspectives are true or sacrifice (at least temporarily) one of the conflicting values.

Symptoms: Procrastination, stumbling block, wall, confusion, inaction, reflection, feeling torn in two directions.

By resolving value conflicts, on top of opening the path for greater truth, power, abundance and freedom, you may also notice these symptoms:
– Increased vitality
– Increased eye-sight
– Seeing things around you never saw before
– Increased personal power
– Feeling more at peace
– Feeling your energy flowing unrestrained

Resolving a value conflict is really shifting your core, and for this reason, it can take a few days for your mind and energy to adapt to the new reality. It is also the reason why shifting your core in such a way is so powerful.

As an exercise, take a sheet of paper and split the page in 5 sections. For each type of value conflict, think about where it shows up in your life. Write down 3 value conflicts for each of the 5 types. Everybody has value conflicts. The easiest way to recognize value conflicts is by looking at where the symptoms show up in your life. If you’re experiencing a lack of results despite tremendous efforts, which type of value conflict is that? If you don’t know where to start, look around God, sex and money; these are the 3 areas that draw the most value conflicts.

Awareness is the greatest key to resolving value conflicts. The first step in resolving any problem is recognizing there is one.

In the next article, I will talk more specifically about when conscious values conflict with subconscious values and what to do about it.

Etienne Charland, Soul Foundation Architect
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